Amazon Kindle

Hooray, I finally bought an Amazon Kindle! I expect in my mailbox Monday. (So Patricia's has me cleaning out all the books from the garage today.

Sexpelled: No Intercourse Allowed (Expelled parody)

Letter to Immigration

To whom it may concern,

Please remove conditions of residency for my wife Patricia Soledad Alegre. We are a happily married couple. 

Patricia and I met Aug. 31, 2003 in a grocery store in Orem, Utah. I asked her for her phone number and she scribbled it on a piece of paper and handed it to me. Our first date was a few days later. I took her to dinner and a movie and tried to impress her with all my knowledge about her country, Argentina (my mom is Argentine too). At first she was skeptical. It took her a little awhile to fall in love with me, but eventually she did. We married in the Timpanogos Temple of Pleasant Grove, Utah on April 30, 2004.

We lived with my parents for a while before we bought our first house a few months later. We didn't stay long there because I was offered a job in Chandler, Ariz. We moved and bought another house. Patricia has played an active role in the lives of my three children.

We've done a lot of traveling together as a couple. We've visited Buenos Aires, Paris, Rome, London, New York, San Diego and Los Angeles. Frankly, I'm tired of her desire to visit these big cities so I've finally convinced her to plan our next vacations in a place like the Caribbean islands or a cabin in Sedona. (We did stay in Sedona once.) We have plenty of plans for the future. We would like to start a family business so she is busy going to school and learning graphic design. I'm considering possibilities of a Master's Degree. We are also planning on expanding our family in the near future.

Sincerely,

David Despain

New Jersey/New York

I have a ton to write about.

First, New York (pictures coming soon). I just got back from New Jersey/New York. I brought along Patricia because it happened to be our anniversary last Wednesday, probably the best day of my life. Backing up a bit, I was there at a training for work, which was fascinating. The dietary supplement industry is soon to become ultra-regulated and much more like a drug environment, but hopefully based more on sound science. No more hocus pocus health companies will survive after June. 

After each day of intense learning, Patricia and I went out. 

Day before anniversary

Curtains - A friend of Patricia's got us a great discount and great seats at Curtains with David Hyde Pierce (from Frasier). We went Tuesday night after work. Curtains was hilarious. It's too bad it's closing. While waiting for Curtains to start we went to the headquarters of Scientology. 

Scientology - I decided that if Ron Hubbard can start his own religion based on far-reaching conclusions and make tons of money, then anyone can. So, what do you say, let's start our own religion. Really, I'm not kidding. We could make a fortune. All we need is to remind people how unsatisfied they are with their own religion and turn them onto a different metaphor of life, or myth, and a personification of their own ultimate ideal, or hero.

Dinner - We went out to dinner and talked about a new book I was reading by Leonard Shlain who believes men evolved big brains so they could figure out how to shag a frigid paleolithic chick with a period and an appetite for bloody, iron-rich steak. That night, we ate Argentine.

Day of anniversary

Central Park - I got to fulfill a dream of mine no one will appreciate at all. I played chess with old geezers in Central Park. I've always wanted to do that. Plus, there was a saxophone playing jazz in the background. We had a romantic walk around the park. 

Teany - We went to Moby's tiny tea place. We had little lover's tea. We ate a little vegan. I bought a teany mug. 

Thai - Then Patricia's friend Jeff took us to eat Thai food at a place called Peep's in Soho. The restaurant had bathrooms behind a one-way mirror. Not kidding. You go to the bathroom, you watch people eat while you do what you do. Creepy? What's more creepy is I had heard about the same place from my friend Lynnette in Chandler. She had stumbled on it while in New York years earlier. Somehow we ended up at the same place. New York is a huge place!  

Jazz - We watched jazz at B.B. King's that night. A band called Pimp the Cat was playing. Something like Jazz-Rock fusion. That's music! I bought a CD.

The day ended perfectly. I don't think it could've been a more perfect day.

Summary

There's something to be said about New York. It's a super diverse place. We met Chinese, Italians, Jews, Palestinians, Argentines, Puerto Ricans, etc. That's a melting pot. We met ultra-high-level business executives, homeless people, and everything in between. I had a conversation with a lawyer and his brother, a doctor, who were in from Seattle to see plays. I had plenty of conversation with students and taxi drivers. And I also had a great conversation with a starving musician named Thoth. I did a lot of talking and decided that it would be good for everyone to visit New York. 

David

New Jersey

Headed out on a red-eye to New Jersey tonight. Staying for 5 days.
Meeting with suppliers at SupplySide East. Doing an advanced course in
GMPs for nutritional supplements. Learning about new FDA laws. Never
been to New Jersey or New York. Patricia hasn't either. We hope to do
a little sightseeing too. (She more than me.) At least go out for our
anniversary Wednesday night. Mostly I'll be learning and studying
though.

UFO sighting at my house last night... seriously!

No it wasn't a plane. No it wasn't a bird. It wasn't even a satellite. The strange lights that everyone in the Phoenix valley saw last night were about a mile wide. They went from a square shape to a v shape. They were red and white. They slowly moved east and then three jets followed them. The sighting made the news in the Arizona Republic.

Why didn't it make the world news? Doesn't this give you the shivers? Are we all crazy in Arizona?

To everyone I know with babies

Check the bottom of your baby's formula bottle. Your own water bottle too. If it contains a "7" in its recycling symbol, then it may potentially leach a harmful chemical called bisphenol-a (B.P.A.) when subjected to high heat. If it does, throw it out.

See New York Times article here.

Biofuels Turning Brazil Rainforest Into Savannah?

Stuff like this, freaks me out. Are we insane? Hybrids are worse on the environment than regular cars? How do we stop the madness? How do we let this happen? The future of the world lies in our hands. The world of our kids lies in our hands.

Lucia

Lucia (a.k.a Lucy or Toti) is the furry animal that greets me at my door daily. She jumps and runs around until I make her calm down. She used to pee on me, but now she only pees on strangers.

Other than messin’ on your shoes she’s absolutely harmless and I’ve not spotted any aggressive strain in her except for occasional barking. I often wonder how a dog like this could have ever survived in the wild. She loves to be pampered and lately she really loves my bed. When I’m asleep, she jumps on and sleeps next to me. Until I wake up and shove her off.

JCF.org

The Joseph Campbell foundation finally came out with a new Web site
http://www.jcf.org/new/index.php

David

Human Footprint

Shoes

Aster tried to be a skaterboy on Saturday. He biffed it a lot. It was fun to watch. Notice the new shoes? He chose them. He's not picky. They were the first ones he saw. He picked them. He loved them. They were cheap.

Hoolahoop queen can make baskets while hoolahoopin. She can also hoolahoop for hours at a time. Notice her new shoes? She tried on every shoe at the store. Skechers, Nikes, etc. She hated them all. She said they made her look like "a midget with giant feet." She wanted to go to Payless instead. I said OK, they're cheaper there. She tried on all the shoes at Payless and settled on these white ones. I thought they made her feet look even bigger than the others. But she likes them.

Will it end?

This is what you get when you have two kids too close together in age. One tells on the other one, the other says he/she didn't do it, and then you hear the yes you dids and no I didn'ts over and over until someone ends up getting kicked or in a headlock. Advice?

Humble Home

I love our little house. But it only has 3 bedrooms. It's too little. We need a bigger house. But the market's down. And we bought when it was high. So we're stuck in our little house for a while. But it's a cute house with really nice tile and carpet, vaulted ceilings, and a cute yard. The best part is that it's only 5 minutes away from work.

My blog is no longer public

I've decided to protect myself a bit. Patricia is probably right in saying that posting pics of the family and a blog of our lives on the net could potentially lead to something undesirable. The good news is that now say juicy things I know only a few people can read.

Nice afternoon with Aiden and Eric

Summer and Ryan let us babysit Aiden and Eric today. Aster tried to be a skater. Kelsea hoolahooped and shot hoops.

Webkinz, give the hamster a chance...

If you have a daughter between the ages of 5 and 10, chances are she has a close relationship with her Webkinz. She probably cuddles it at night and then plays with a virtual version of the same "pet" online.

How can the hamster compete? Will it become a pet of the past? I think so. Why? Because Webkinz animals don't bite. They don't need cages. You don't need to clean out smelly droppings. The biggest drawback for my kids is that there's no digital video game benefits.

So I say to Webkinz, "Bring back the hamster, please." If you can sell my daughter a stuffed animal for $15 with a digital version of it online, then why not do the same thing with hamsters. And not just hamsters. Why not parakeets? Maybe kids should learn responsibility of caring for an actual living animal and be able to play with a virtual version of it online. Maybe Webkinz should give us back our smelly pet poop... or at least create a digital alternative.

My kid beats up another kid

"Hi Dad, I was in a fight today."

"What happened?"

"Don't worry. It was self-defense."

"How was it self-defense?"

"I was walking along with [BOY] and [BOY] and there was a kid making fun of us. He called us names. We started saying stuff back. He said he could beat us up. I said I could beat him up. I didn't want him to hit [BOY] so I got in front. He punched me. And we started fighting."

"What did you do to him?"

"I got him to the ground. I think his glasses were broken. He was crying."

"Are you sure it was self defense?"

"Yup."

"Aster, you're a trained ground fighter. I'm sure you knew you could beat him up. But don't let all that confidence go to your head. It doesn't matter if he started it. I think you could have probably done a little more to avoid a fight."

"But..."

"Listen. You can always fight. But it takes maturity to walk away. You don't need to prove anything. You're not a bully."

"Oh... [PAUSE] Dad, please don't tell Master Lopez about it."

"OK."

Patricia

This is my pretty Patricia bringing me lunch in her Ford Focus. If you happen to be next to her on the road and she doesn't notice you, you'll spot her singing loud and shamelessly in that car. David

Jiujitsu champ

This is my son (he's had a haircut now) with his two senseis after winning first place at a jiujitsu tournament. He's gotten pretty darn good. We needed to have a little chat about what the difference was between "self-defense" and "showing off". David