Can we buy it?

Bearded dragon

Alligator

Yes, I let my kids pet alligators.

Torie and the tortoise

We went to a reptile show and I got this cool pic.

Python wraps around Aster

squirmy little fella

Get it off me!

Kelsea holding a blacked-headed python

Torie petting a boa

David

no, please not diego

please excuse me while I rattle on about soccer. (that foreign sport) 

i hated basile and his undecipherable player choices, but i just wanted to cry when i heard diego took over my beloved seleccion. so many other good coaches to choose from: bianchi, batista, simeone. talk about a guy who just feels he's entitled to anything he doesn't earn. guess we should all bow and worship the self-proclaimed 'hand of god'. 

and his crazy message of how he's going to only choose players that 'play with heart' just shows we'll be counting on divine grace to see argentina through the qualifiers. and heaven forbid messi crosses him again after suggesting batista would have been a better choice. 

what kills me is that he gets a crack at the job now, after argentina's beautiful show at the world cup and in china. u take the greatest team on earth and give it to this undeserving nutball. i'm hopeful. very hopeful in diego's right-hand man bilardo. i did like diego's (or bilardo's) last choice of players much more than basile's. maybe we'll see some success. and if not, maybe i'll just be satisfied in saying, 'i told them so'. 

marcelo bielsa is the best coach in the world, so get used to saying, "¡aguante chile!"

d

Talents to Recognize

Torie's advertising skills -

Today she gave me a advertisement today that read: "Are you unhappy and need to get away? Then call Torie and Victoria's tippady tappaday toes. Number Do Dae Do Yell Fun in the Sun." So cute!

Aster's creative story line skills -

Today he put together little cartoons he made for YouTube that he made using a stick figure animation program. He makes these cartoons on paper all the time.

Kelsea's time-management skills -

Not only does she wake me up each morning like an alarm clock ("Dad! Time to wake up!"), today she presented me with a schedule of when I was to watch a program with her and at what time I was to study for my test.

Mornings

Kelsea woke me up this morning and the following conversation ensued: Kelsea: Torie won't let me take a shower and it's 7:30. Great, I'm going to be late. Dad: OK, calm down. Where is Torie right now? Kelsea: She's in the bathroom and she won't get out. Dad: What's she doing? Kelsea: She's on the toilet. Dad: Why don't you just wait until she's done? Kelsea: She says she won't get off the toilet until someone brings her some toilet paper. Dad: [reaches under my sink and pulling our a roll] I think you're answer lies in this cylindrical object. [Kelsea takes the roll and walks off] [Dad goes back to his pillow]

Does global warming exist?

Dear smart people I know, 

I had always been of the opinion that despite whether global warming exists or not, I simply didn't think it wise to risk the only Earth we have. Well, I just attended an informed lecture on climate change and thought I'd share some of what I learned with you since there appears to be so much confusion these political days, doggone it. 

See attached PowerPoint show on IPCC. (Yes, it does include corrections that were needed for the movie, Inconvenient Truth, which simply makes it more objective than non-scientist Al Gore.) 

Summary

Basically, global climate change always occurs, but there has been a sudden spike in warming that, despite all other factors, is directly attributed to human interference. If the human-caused warming spike continues, then we might not like it so much. In fact, it's likely we're all doomed. Have a nice day!

Quotes from Scientific Community

"It is unequivocal that the climate is changing, and it is very likely that this is predominantly caused by the increasing human interference with the atmosphere... Our present energy course is not sustainable." 

- Joint statement of the Academies of Science from all G8 countries

"There is adequate evidence from observations and interpretations of climate simulations to conclude that the atmosphere, ocean, and land surface are warming; that humans have significantly contributed to this change; and that further climate change will continue to have important impacts on human societies, on economies, and on wildlife through the 21st century and beyond" 

- American Meteorological Society

"If this 2 degrees C warming is to be avoided, then our net annual emissions of CO2 must be reduced by more than 50 percent within this century."

-American Institute of Physics and the American Astronomical Society

"The GSA supports the scientific conclusions that Earth's climate is changing; the climate changes are due in part to human activities... the potential implications of global climate change and the time scale over which such changes will likely occur require active, effective, long-term planning"

-Geological Society of America

"Careful and comprehensive scientific assessments have clearly demonstrated that the Earth's climate system is changing rapidly in response to growing atmospheric burdens of greenhouse gases and absorbing aerosol particles. There is very little room for doubt that observed climate trends are due to human activities. The threats are serious and action is urgently needed to mitigate the risks of climate change."

-American Chemical Society

"Global warming is one of the most serious challenges facing us today. To protect the health and economic well-being of current and future generations, we must reduce our emissions of heat-trapping gases by using technology, know-how, and practical solutions already at our disposal."

-Union of Concerned Scientists

Feel free to share with others. 

David

Celebrating Chris's new job

Our little bro Chris finally got a job at Taco Bell. He will now have something to do with his time besides sleep. I was ecstatic, so in an attempt to celebrate, I took Chris with Nono and the kids for Bingsoo (Tawainese version of Italian ice).

1st attempt at conversation went like this: 

David: "Hooray! free tacos for us!" 

Chris: "No dude. They don't even give me free tacos. It's stupid."

David: "Hooray! Free hot sauce for tacos." 

Silence. 

2nd attempt at conversation:

Nono wants to tease Chris about his lack of a girlfriend. He picks up magazine with a hot chick on the cover.

Nono: "Oooh, looky Chris. Looky here."

Chris: "You're 80 years old looking at young women. That's really creepy." 

David and Nono chuckle and say indecipherable things in Spanish that Chris won't understand. 

3rd attempt at conversation:

Our server happens to be Chinese, so Nono attempts a joke.   

Nono: "Este tiene cara de chino." -laughs at his own joke-  

Chris stares at Nono: "Uhhh... OK." 

David tries to explain background of joke. 

Chris in a really, really serious tone: "It's illogical. It's not funny."

David starts laughing and can't stop. 

Want more??

4th attempt at conversation:

David shows everyone how he can bend plastic ice cream spoon with his mind. 

David: "Maybe life is all a computer program until you know how to bend the rules." 

Aster: "Sometimes I think I'm in a 100-year TV show and everyone is watching me."

David: "Cool! Aliens are watching you on TV? Am I a robot?"

Chris: "They're not watching you on TV, dude. No, they're not. If they were then blah blah blah. The universe blah blah blah and the world blah blah blah. And I hate it when blah blah blah. You think you know every blah blah blah."

David: "Uh, Chris, he's only 12."

--------------

Cheers from AZ, 

David Despain

Torie crawlin up wall

Torie crawlin up the wall

Patri w Debbie the bird

Both so cute

Don't poop on me

Debbie and lucy on girls heads (pic taken with my phone)

sep 7

i'm writing really late so i'll need to keep it short. here's some pics of our last adventure down to tucson and ryan's house in hereford (capital of hummingbirds, but we saw flycatchers). we had a blast at the arizona desert museum, the san pedro river and the huachuca mountains. lots of birds for aster to find. they dug for fossils. they saw kestrels, lizards, etc. we've been really busy. i've started school again. taking biochem that's really hurting my head's biochem. but we still find time to have fun. today we were out in superior with a biologist and spotted a ring-neck snake. the biologist picked it up and let the kids touch it. aster's babysitting a couple of lovebirds for a friend. really rare ones that cost a bunch of money.  

David

Debbie the tino lovebird likes our oranges.

Kids posing in front of a mountain lion hungrily looking over them

at the Arizona Desert museum over Labor Day weekend

Last Child in the Woods

Last Child in the Woods: Saving Our Children from Nature-Deficit Disorder by Richard Louv

My review

rating: 4 of 5 stars
Recommended for every city-dwelling parent, this book brings a child-psychologist viewpoint on why we must introduce our children to nature.


View all my reviews.

Jim Burns

Jim Burns' Arizona Birds: From the Backyard to the Backwoods by Jim Burns

My review

rating: 3 of 5 stars
After meeting Jim Burns on a guided birdwatching walk at the Boyce Thompson Arboretum, I began reading his book. It's not just a guide because it offers a little something memorable about each bird.


View all my reviews.

Peach-faced Lovebirds in Phoenix

Aster and I were walking along at the Gilbert Riparian Preserve and were stunned by a family of non-native peach-faced lovebirds. An extraordinary non-North American moment. Aster says it was "like being in the Amazon jungle". Lots of singing. The birds have created a new home here. Aster was beside himself. We might have to take a trip south for more. 

This was years ago, but I just had to blog it

--
David

The little ones need help

David

Expanding family

Jolina and Cocker (as in Spaniel)

Why I need to live in South America

Yesterday was an unofficial holiday in Argentina (after Arg-Brazil 3-0) while Marcos and I celebrated by going out to lunch. We thought of going to a Brazilian churrasco and chanting Argentina on the way in, but those Brazilian restaurants rob you -- $28 for the lunch buffet?!! Instead we went to a Thai place. Kind of a downer. 

David

Nature Walks

We went on a lizard nature walk with a biologist who was super-impressed with Aster's ability to point out different lizards and birds. The next day we followed up with a bird walk. We've planned some more all through November. By the time it's December we'll be experts of the desert. Attached are some pictures of some of the adventure. I spotted that whipsnake in a tree I was walking past! We saw some great birds and lizards, but my camera sucks. 

I'm out of Haagen Dazs sorbet

I'll blog this and call it my lunch break from working at home. If you ever get your tonsils out, be sure to stock up on Haagen Dazs sorbet. I like raspberry best. It's really good. But when you run out, life sucks.

What's worse is that I'm home alone without any Haagen Dazs sorbet. That means I can't tell anybody to go get any at the store for me. I have to get up, take a shower, and go get some myself.

No, I can't eat regular ice cream. The milk of it gets all mucousy (not a word) in my throat.

What do I do when I sit at home all day eating Haagen Dazs?

I go to the Haagen Dazs Web site, of course, and learn all about the company's mission to save the honey bees.

Now that I've gone to the Web site, I really appreciate honey bees and I feel good about eating as much sorbet as I can. I wonder just how much money Haagen Dazs spent on honey bee research and how much they spent on the honey bee Web game.

check out this yak

I want to upgrade my boat to an Agent 6.0. It's small. Great for tricks. I can let Aster use it. It's about a $1,000. Should I go for it? 

David

Tonsils out; surgery went well

I actually don't really remember what happened. I don't feel nearly as bad as I thought I would. But maybe that's just cuz my painkillers haven't wore off. 

I feel like a small part of me has been pulverized to ashes. 

David

Send me your awesome athletic pics

I need the motivation...

The other day a lady I was talking to on the phone said to me, "I've seen pictures of your family. Are you as athletic as they are?"

"No. I just look at their pictures, watch their movies and feel incredibly jealous," I said. It's a conversation I've had over and over again. All the pics of crazy stunts of my family has made them famous. I explained to the lady, "Whenever I try to do anything athletic (like run a mile or even go swimming) I end up with a sore throat for a week." 

"You should get your tonsils out," the lady told me.

"I know. I'm trying."

Tomorrow's the day. My tonsils will be no more. I know this is like déjà vu, but I think I will actually be able to get them out this time. And my doctor says he is not able to describe the agony I will be in for the next two weeks. 

I'll be suffering so all I ask is that you send me your best rock climbing, capoeira, kayaking, and snowboarding pics. I'm going to hang them on my wall. Some day soon I'll have crazy stunt pics too (within reason; a couple of you are clearly insane.). 

 
David

--
David

Politics

In the last year my political self has been pretty rocked and I've been having a lot of trouble determining exactly what I should describe myself as now. So I took a quiz, which I believe I did pretty well at, and now think everyone should take it.

You are a Social Liberal (66% permissive) and an... Economic Moderate (41% permissive) You are best described as a: Centrist Link: The Politics Test on Ok Cupid Also : The OkCupid Dating Persona Test

When the Lemonade Stand Goes Sour

After borrowing four dollars, formulating a delicious product, and putting together a killer marketing campaign (complete with singing), Aster and Torie were only able to make 50 cents from their lemonade stand .

That's after two hours of sweating in the Arizona heat. The only two customers who bought were Grandma and Nona (the kids's great-grandma).

I told the kids they needed a new sign that said, "Water sucks! Drink lemonade and lose weight!"
 

Are you a conservative or liberal patriot?

Either way you should read Time magazine's just-released "The Real Meaning of Patriotism" for a refreshing view of how we might all better understand each other

Happy Independence Day!

I met Robert Kiyosaki

I went to a party and Robert Kiyosaki was there. Wow! I thought. I'll go meet him. So I said, "Hi, I'm David!" Robert just looked at me blankly. I started to introduce myself. He just looked at me blankly. "Anyway, I hoped maybe I could get a picture with you." Robert straightened up and smiled. (He knew what he was doing.) I said, "Thanks." He looked at me blankly. I walked away.

Girls meet Amanda Borden

The girls met 1996 Gold Medalist Amanda Borden at their gymnastics meet. They each got their own mini-gold medals that day too.
 
David

A photo of me

David

My supermodel and her Webkinz

Supermodel Torie won't pose without bringing her "family" along. So all the Webkinz went surfing.   
 
David

Aster steals the maté again

He's getting into the habit of coming over and robbing the maté. And his hair's getting long too. My son is too much like me. I can't believe how much he reads. He's read the entire Harry Potter series straight, all of the Jean Craighead George's My Side of the Mountain series and now Gary Paulsen's Hatchet series. 

David

moby - enjoy!

Aster Takes 3rd Place, Loses to Girl

Aster won two out of three of his matches at the state jiujitsu tournament and took third place. He lost to a little girl with awesome skills. I think it was really good for Aster. He had no idea what hit him. Of the eight total competitors seven were boys and one was a girl. The little girl won first place! And she was all modest about it too.

Ode to my Kindle

I don't have an iPhone. I have a Kindle.

 

My Kindle can't call people. It can't surf the net. It can't take pictures. It doesn't have a GPS. It doesn't even have any cool games. In fact, it has all sorts of design problems. And it looks very, very low tech.

 

Why did I buy this stupid thing anyway? Why did I buy it when it cost me more than what an iPhone now costs?

 

I bought it because now that I have my Kindle, I can go to the beach, the park, the coffee shop or the toilet, and I will always have plenty of reading material. Now that I have my Kindle, I can read one or two or 20 books all at once and the end tables next to my couch and my bed don't end up cluttered. Now that i have my Kindle, my library fits in my hand all day long and my house has a whole lot more room (my wife loves that).

 

I love my Kindle.

Please help... I can't pick a good movie

I have completely exhausted all my creative powers of choosing good movies and the bad movies keep coming in the mail.

Movies are supposed to be exciting right? Whenever I see a new movie in my mailbox, I just feel like I'm about to waste another two hours of my time. (Sometimes I just keep a movie for a long time to not have to add a new one to my queue.) 

Anyone see a good movie lately?

Before you suggest anything, you should know that in college I made the mistake of studying literary archetypes, motifs and devices, thus severely hampering my ability to enjoy the simplicity of a run-of-the-mill flick designed to appeal to the masses (e.g. National Treasure -- the last piece of crap that comes to mind).

The last really good movie I saw? This one.

My tonsils live to die another day

My surgery was canceled because I had a high fever. The anesthesiologist said it was too dangerous. So I'm totally bummed and I've rescheduled for July 25. 

David

San Diego trip pics

Finally, New York pics

Selfish Gene

The Selfish Gene by Richard Dawkins

I'm reading this in an attempt at becoming smart.


View all my reviews.

I'm proud to be a feminist

After reading the graphic novel Persepolis a couple of days ago. I highly recommend it. Or you can just watch the movie coming out. See trailer below:

Think you're a hard-core feminist like me? Are you sure? If you are, you have to read The Alphabet Versus The Goddess. The book changed my life forever giving me a whole new way to look at the world.

Here's my review from GoodReads: You'll learn how paleolithic man in almost all ancient cultures worshipped an Earth and fertility Goddess (like an ancient pornography - my opinion). Men finally realized their own sperm had something to do with procreation and decided women should be their property so they could make sure their kids were their own. Soon men invented male "Gods". Then with the appearance of the alphabet, the Torah, Koran, etc., all humans were driven to worship only one male God, which ultimately killed "the Goddess" and submitted all women to man's rule... until now!

If you happen to be interested in FLDS women studies, read Stolen Innocence: My Story of Growing Up in a Polygamous Sect, Becoming a Teenage Bride, and Breaking Free of Warren Jeffs. Warning! This book can get you reeling within the first few chapters. You'll ask yourself, how could these things have happened here?

My bucket list

Hi!

I'm finally getting my tonsils out this Friday. I know I'll be asleep. But it scares the crap out of me anyway. So I naturally have to think of my own mortality. Anyway, I rented the movie called The Bucket List where a couple of old guys who have cancer find out they'll die in 6 months. They make a list of all the things they want to do before they die and go do it. They go skydiving. They climb an Egyptian pyramid. They race cars. They get tattoos. Etc. So I decided to put together my own bucket list. 

Let me know what you think: 

• Kayak off a waterfall (again) and get a picture of it like Casey
• Relax on a Caribbean island with Patricia (she's never been)
  
• Go on a wild nature adventure with Aster (at least a week long)
• Go to Paris with Kelsea and Torie 
• Hike to Machu Picchu because, to me, Dallas's pictures suggest it may just be the most beautiful place on Earth  
• Become a specialist and write a book about something fascinating that will change the world

It's a really short list right now. But that last entry is a tough one. Who wants to do any of this with me? Oh and by the way, if I die or anything this Friday (or anytime soon), all I ask is that someone do these things for me. Too much to ask? You can just take a piece of me with you (like a sock or something). 

Thanks,  

David

Aprender a ser amado

Tus ojos me encantan

y me llenan de felicidad

la manera que brillan

y me miran con curiosidad

Lo que quiero mas que todo

aunque merezco sufrir

es ganar tus brillante ojos 

de vuelta la manera que me hacen sentir

A veces no nos entendemos

somos extraños de verdad

pero no hay que pretendernos

porque hay que tomar oportunidad

La vida es nuestra

para disfrutar hoy

es por eso que nos cuesta

ver errores en lo que soy 

No hay que dejar que sea vapor

todo lo que hemos armado

hay que enseñar un puro amor

y aprender a ser amado

David

Argentina 4 Mexico 1

I drove to San Diego to watch this game. Now that I've seen Messi and Aguero in action live, I can die happy. Mexico's defense was no match for that magic duo. Marcos, Andres and I were at field level. You might be able to see us if you squint really hard sometime just after Messi scores goal No 2. Argentina plays the U.S. tomorrow. I'll send highlights, but try not to miss it. - David

---

Argentina 4 Mexico 1 Goles Burdisso Messi Rodriguez Aguero Z mas goles en http://www.apurogol.com Argentina 4 Mexico 1 Goles Burdisso Messi Rodriguez Aguero Zinha

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So much space, but no toilet?

WASHINGTON (Reuters) - Astronauts aboard the NASA space shuttle Discovery will be carrying an extra piece of cargo when they launch on Saturday -- a new toilet pump.

Crew members aboard the International Space Station have been fumbling with plastic bags since their zero-gravity toilet went made "a loud noise" and stopped working properly last week.

"We will be taking some spare parts up," NASA spokesman Allard Beutel said in a telephone interview on Wednesday.

The three station crew members want the toilet working properly for obvious reasons -- but on Saturday they will be sharing facilities with seven space shuttle astronauts.

"You can imagine you are having guests over and your one and only bathroom is broken. Clearly this is something you want to have working," Beutel said.

Discovery will carry a pump and other spare parts for the toilet, which is still disposing of solid waste.

http://www.reuters.com/article/oddlyEnoughNews/idUSN2833684620080529?feedType=RSS&feedName=oddlyEnoughNews

--
David

Amazon Kindle

Hooray, I finally bought an Amazon Kindle! I expect in my mailbox Monday. (So Patricia's has me cleaning out all the books from the garage today.

Sexpelled: No Intercourse Allowed (Expelled parody)

Letter to Immigration

To whom it may concern,

Please remove conditions of residency for my wife Patricia Soledad Alegre. We are a happily married couple. 

Patricia and I met Aug. 31, 2003 in a grocery store in Orem, Utah. I asked her for her phone number and she scribbled it on a piece of paper and handed it to me. Our first date was a few days later. I took her to dinner and a movie and tried to impress her with all my knowledge about her country, Argentina (my mom is Argentine too). At first she was skeptical. It took her a little awhile to fall in love with me, but eventually she did. We married in the Timpanogos Temple of Pleasant Grove, Utah on April 30, 2004.

We lived with my parents for a while before we bought our first house a few months later. We didn't stay long there because I was offered a job in Chandler, Ariz. We moved and bought another house. Patricia has played an active role in the lives of my three children.

We've done a lot of traveling together as a couple. We've visited Buenos Aires, Paris, Rome, London, New York, San Diego and Los Angeles. Frankly, I'm tired of her desire to visit these big cities so I've finally convinced her to plan our next vacations in a place like the Caribbean islands or a cabin in Sedona. (We did stay in Sedona once.) We have plenty of plans for the future. We would like to start a family business so she is busy going to school and learning graphic design. I'm considering possibilities of a Master's Degree. We are also planning on expanding our family in the near future.

Sincerely,

David Despain

New Jersey/New York

I have a ton to write about.

First, New York (pictures coming soon). I just got back from New Jersey/New York. I brought along Patricia because it happened to be our anniversary last Wednesday, probably the best day of my life. Backing up a bit, I was there at a training for work, which was fascinating. The dietary supplement industry is soon to become ultra-regulated and much more like a drug environment, but hopefully based more on sound science. No more hocus pocus health companies will survive after June. 

After each day of intense learning, Patricia and I went out. 

Day before anniversary

Curtains - A friend of Patricia's got us a great discount and great seats at Curtains with David Hyde Pierce (from Frasier). We went Tuesday night after work. Curtains was hilarious. It's too bad it's closing. While waiting for Curtains to start we went to the headquarters of Scientology. 

Scientology - I decided that if Ron Hubbard can start his own religion based on far-reaching conclusions and make tons of money, then anyone can. So, what do you say, let's start our own religion. Really, I'm not kidding. We could make a fortune. All we need is to remind people how unsatisfied they are with their own religion and turn them onto a different metaphor of life, or myth, and a personification of their own ultimate ideal, or hero.

Dinner - We went out to dinner and talked about a new book I was reading by Leonard Shlain who believes men evolved big brains so they could figure out how to shag a frigid paleolithic chick with a period and an appetite for bloody, iron-rich steak. That night, we ate Argentine.

Day of anniversary

Central Park - I got to fulfill a dream of mine no one will appreciate at all. I played chess with old geezers in Central Park. I've always wanted to do that. Plus, there was a saxophone playing jazz in the background. We had a romantic walk around the park. 

Teany - We went to Moby's tiny tea place. We had little lover's tea. We ate a little vegan. I bought a teany mug. 

Thai - Then Patricia's friend Jeff took us to eat Thai food at a place called Peep's in Soho. The restaurant had bathrooms behind a one-way mirror. Not kidding. You go to the bathroom, you watch people eat while you do what you do. Creepy? What's more creepy is I had heard about the same place from my friend Lynnette in Chandler. She had stumbled on it while in New York years earlier. Somehow we ended up at the same place. New York is a huge place!  

Jazz - We watched jazz at B.B. King's that night. A band called Pimp the Cat was playing. Something like Jazz-Rock fusion. That's music! I bought a CD.

The day ended perfectly. I don't think it could've been a more perfect day.

Summary

There's something to be said about New York. It's a super diverse place. We met Chinese, Italians, Jews, Palestinians, Argentines, Puerto Ricans, etc. That's a melting pot. We met ultra-high-level business executives, homeless people, and everything in between. I had a conversation with a lawyer and his brother, a doctor, who were in from Seattle to see plays. I had plenty of conversation with students and taxi drivers. And I also had a great conversation with a starving musician named Thoth. I did a lot of talking and decided that it would be good for everyone to visit New York. 

David